Parents

Parents can play a key role in preventing and stopping bullying. But first they have to know if their children bully or are bullied by others. Many parents do not discuss bullying with their children, and many children do not raise the topic of bullying with their parents.

Some parents of children who bully may also support such behavior without knowing it. They may use power and aggression to resolve conflicts, or they may fail to keep track of and stop bullying at home. Also, as children get older, bullying often occurs when adults are not around.

See this video at http://www.stopbullying.gov/parents/index.html

(source: http://www.stopbullying.gov)

How to Deal with Being Bullied (Teens)

If you have been bullied, it may affect you in many ways. You may not want to go to school or may find it hard to do your homework. You may be losing sleep, eating more or less than usual, having headaches or stomachaches, or getting sick more often. Know that you do not have to feel this way.

Your Feelings are Important

• Do not blame yourself. It is easy to question whether you are the problem. But no matter what someone says or does, you should not be ashamed of who you are or what you feel.
• Be proud of who you are. No matter what they say, there are wonderful things about you. Keep those in mind instead of the disrespectful messages you get from the people who are bullying you.
• Do not be afraid to get help. Sometimes it helps to just talk to someone who is not personally involved. Teachers, counselors, and others are there to help. Seeing a counselor or other professional does not mean there is something wrong with you.

What to Do When You Are Being Bullied

The first priority is always your safety. Here are some strategies for you to consider:

• Tell them to stop.
• Walk away. Do not let them get to you. If you walk away or ignore them, they will not get that satisfaction.
• Protect yourself. Sometimes you cannot walk away. If you are being physically hurt, protect yourself so that you can get away.
• Tell an adult you trust. Talking to someone could help you figure out the best ways to deal with the problem. In some cases, adults need to get involved for the bullying to stop.
• Find a safe place. Go somewhere that you feel safe and secure like the library, a favorite teacher’s classroom, or the office.
• Stick together. Stay with a group or individuals that you trust.
• Find opportunities to make new friends. Explore your interests and join school or community activities such as sports, drama, or art. Volunteer or participate in community service.

(source: www.stopbullying.gov)

How to Deal with Being Bullied

If you have been bullied, it may affect you in many ways. Know that you don’t have to feel this way. There are resources that can help.

What to Do When You Are Being Bullied

• Tell them to stop.
• Do not blame yourself. Remember that no matter what someone says, you should not be ashamed of who you are or what you feel.
• Be proud of who you are.
• Talk with someone you trust. Talking to someone could help you figure out the best ways to deal with the problem. Reach out to family members and friends you trust to discuss the problem.
• Do not be afraid to ask for help. Talking to a counselor or health professional can help you get through the emotional effects of bullying.
• Policies and laws may apply to you. Federal, state and local law may also offer you protection if the bullying has risen to a certain level. Many schools, colleges, and places of work also have policies against bullying or other related behaviors. Reach out to representatives in your community to find out more about what assistance is available to you.

(source: http://www.stopbullying.gov/)

Cyberbullying

Cyberbullying, instead of happening face-to-face, happens through the use of technology such as computers, cell phones and other electronic devices. Cyberbullying peaks around the end of middle school and the beginning of high school.

Examples of cyberbullying include:

• Sending hurtful, rude, or mean text messages to others
• Spreading rumors or lies about others by e-mail or on social networks
• Creating websites, videos or social media profiles that embarrass, humiliate, or make fun of others

Bullying online is very different from face-to-face bullying because messages and images can be:

• Sent 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year
• Shared be shared to a very wide audience
• Sent anonymously

Effects of Cyberbullying

Research on cyberbullying has found that students involved are more likely to:

• Be unwilling to attend school
• Receive poor grades
• Have lower self-esteem
• Have more health problems

Cyberbullying can have particular affects on those who are targeted. Research has found that young people who have been cyberbullied are significantly more likely to:

• Use alcohol and drugs
• Skip school
• Experience in-person bullying or victimization

What is Bullying?

Bullying is a widespread and serious problem that can happen anywhere. It is not a phase children have to go through, it is not "just messing around", and it is not something to grow out of. Bullying can cause serious and lasting harm.

Although definitions of bullying vary, most agree that bullying involves:

• Imbalance of Power: people who bully use their power to control or harm and the people being bullied may have a hard time defending themselves
• Intent to Cause Harm: actions done by accident are not bullying; the person bullying has a goal to cause harm
• Repetition: incidents of bullying happen to the same the person over and over by the same person or group

Types of Bullying

Bullying can take many forms. Examples include:

• Verbal: name-calling, teasing
• Social:spreading rumors, leaving people out on purpose, breaking up friendships
• Physical: hitting, punching, shoving
• Cyberbullying: using the Internet, mobile phones or other digital technologies to harm others

An act of bullying may fit into more than one of these groups.

Take the Bullying Quiz

How much do you know about bullying?

Schedule for Straight Talk - Anti-Bullying Event - Thursday Evening

Schedule for the Evening

March 24^th

6:50 – 7:10 Refreshments

Visit local agency tables

PARENT PROGRAM --> In Middle School Dining Hall

7:10: Welcome & Introduction:

-Edward Hallisey, Putnam Valley Middle School Principal

7:15: Bullying 101

-Andrea Fallick, LCSW, CASAC,

Assistant Director for School Based Programs, Student Assistance Services

8:05: Panel of Experts:

-Adam Levy, Putnam County District Attorney

-Joseph DeMarzo, Putnam County Youth Bureau & Mental Health

-Aileen Napolitano, Probation Officer

-James Reitz, Putnam County Court Judge

-Deputy Richard Mansfield, Putnam Valley School Resource Officer

-Edward Hallisey, Putnam Valley Middle School Principal

-Michael Hanna, Putnam Valley Middle School Assistant Principal

Middle School Student Workshops

7:10 – 8:00 MS Student Workshop I

8:05 – 8:55 MS Student Workshop II

Select a workshop & enjoy!

(1) BFF, BFFA, BFFE - Friends Forever - What Does that Mean? Is It Possible?

Kristel Halton, LCSW, CPS Prevention Educator

Let us think outside the “BFF BOX”. What does it mean to be a good friend and how do I keep friends? Join us for a fun workshop on friendship and a chance to talk about how much friends make our life more wonderful and how sometimes it’s not easy being a good friend.

Friendship isn't a big thing - it's a million little things. ~Author Unknown

Location: Room 210 / Target Audience: All

(2) The Good, the Bad & the Ugly of Energy Drinks

The Truth About Energy Drinks
Elaine N. Santos, MA Putnam County Communities That Care Coalition Coordinator
Do you use energy drinks to stay awake or give yourself that extra boost? Join us for a hands-on presentation about the truth, including the potential dangers of consuming energy drinks. Learn healthier ways to be on your game and stay focused!

Location: Room 211 / Target Audience: All

(3) Matters of the heart! Meghan McCarthy, MPH, Community Educator/ Volunteer Coordinator Putnam Northern Westchester Women’s Resource Center
Dating relationships will be the focus of this interactive workshop. Students will learn the difference between healthy and unhealthy behaviors that occur in dating relationships. They will walk away from this workshop better able to identify these characteristics in their own relationships.

Location: Room 212 / Target Audience: 7^th and 8^th graders

(4) Mirror, Mirror on the Wall: Body Image, Self Image, and Healthy Eating.

Laura Mazzotta, LMSW, NYS licensed social worker with a private practice in Carmel

Learn to develop your own healthy style! Differences are all around us, in hair color, skin color, height, gender, and body type. Unfortunately, a lot of the messages we receive from the media, friends, and society tell us there is one right way to look, and that the way we look defines us. This workshop will help you learn to challenge these messages, practice good nutrition, and appreciate what makes you unique, inside and out!

Location: Room 213 / Target Audience: All

(5) Project Rewind…Nurses’ Network of America

Rachelle Riguard RN, BSN, Educational Consultant

Project Rewind engages the audience with original artwork that uses unique analogies related to the effects of alcohol. The dangers of alcohol are underscored with special emphasis on identifying friends who exhibit signs of alcohol toxicity. The steps for safe intervention are discussed and “first response” measures are stressed. The Project Rewind program has been successful at engaging teens in the important and dangerous topic of alcohol abuse.

Location: Room 214 / Target Audience: All

(6) The Blooey Project: The Issues of Name Calling and Bullying
PVHS GSA/ VOICES club
(Gay Straight Alliance / Voices of Individuals Creating Environments that are Safe)
In this workshop high school students from the Putnam Valley High School GSA/ VOICES club will lead an activity that examine issues of name calling and bullying. In this workshop, you'll get to meet "Blooey" and experience first hand how name calling and bullying have influenced him. Learn how you can take a stand and make a positive difference.

Location: Room 215 / Target Audience: All

What Kids, Teens and Young Adults Can Do

Be Smart Online and Texting

You can prevent cyberbullying by being careful of what you do:

• Always think about what you post or say. Do not share secrets, photos or anything that might be embarrassing to you or others. What seems funny or innocent at the time could be used against you. You do not have complete control over what others forward or post.
• Set privacy settings on your accounts. Make sure that you are only sharing information with people you know and trust. Pay attention to notices from social networks, because sometimes privacy settings change.

Make Cyberbullying Stop

If you or someone you know is being cyberbullied, know that it does not have to be this way. There things you can do to help you and your friends:

• Talk with someone you trust. Talking to someone could help you figure out the best ways to deal with the problem. Reach out to a family member, friend or another adult that you trust.
• Do not respond to cyberbullying. Sometimes people post or text teasing or name-calling to get a reaction. If someone has posted or sent a message that could be hurtful to others, refuse to pass it along or respond to it.
• Keep evidence of cyberbullying. Record the dates, times and descriptions of instances when cyberbullying has occurred. Save and print screenshots, e-mails, and text messages.
• Block the person who is cyberbullying you. Many websites and phone companies let you block people. Also, cyberbullying may violate the “Terms and Conditions” of these services. Consider contacting the service provider to file a complaint.
• Report the incident to your school. They may be able to help you resolve the cyberbullying or be watchful for face-to-face bullying.
• Ask for help. Sometimes, talking to a counselor or health professional can help you get through the emotional effects of bullying.

(source: http://www.stopbullying.gov)